Post by PANTHRO on Jul 13, 2013 22:58:22 GMT -6
Don’t Drag Me Down.
Clawing my way to the top and getting somewhere...it feels abnormal to me. I feel a little warm inside, maybe because something’s stuck finally and I’m running with it. That’s all I ever wanted really...somewhere I belong where I can make friends and relationships. It feels great, yeah, should I get comfortable where I am? Should I feel satisfied with just this? Hell no. The belt I hold, paints a target on my back for everyone to come at me and take it away. They want me out of the picture, not because they see me as a legitimate threat; Though some people are good at fronting. They don’t like me because of my personality.
The way I talk, the things I say on Twitter, the people I interact with...it irks them. It makes me irritated that I got to this spot so fast in my career, and it shows. I see the faces, the glances, the comments, and I gotta say, all of this fuels me to do better. Jerry Matthews is a very good case of negative energy disguising itself as a positive aura. This guy can sit there and he can try and downplay me, make me seem like I ain’t got a fighting chance, but who the fuck is he? Just a guy with bible who doesn’t believe in Speed Stick.
For him to think he’s bringing guys like me everlasting salvation, really shows where we are in this day and age. What he is however is a misinformed screwjob who’s going to get the harsh reality that his delusional grandeur is going to come to a BIG halt. So Jerry can try and drag me down, but each comment he makes, it empowers me to put a boot up his holy anus. Everytime they think they’ve found me out...
I Come Back Stronger.
I was sitting down in the coached office, my heart was beating hard and I knew this wasn’t going to end well. I was glaring at this bastard on my right, who was glaring daggers right back at me, like he wanted to do something. Believe me, I welcomed it, I wanted him to make a move, and I wanted to finish what he started. But there he was, with this cocky look on his face, thinking he was going to get some sort of special treatment. Mr. First-Round-Pick was beginning to tick me the Hell off and he knew it. There Coach came in, looking at both of us like a father would to two fighting brothers. He sat down at his desk which was piled with playbooks and tapes. He leaned forward with a serious glance, licking the front of his upper teeth and pointed at us both.
Coach: So tell me this, why the Hell shouldn’t I cut both of your asses loose? Why shouldn’t I ban your asses from this facility....hm? Tell me why the Hell I get called back in here trying to build a FOOTBALL team, just to see two boys fighting amongst each other just to see who’s cock is bigger.
I looked at Tyson DeMarco, who didn’t look like he was ready to talk. I rub the back of my neck and lean forward.
Steve Lenton: I just wanna say--
Coach: Save it Lenton. I wanna know what Mr. Number One has to say, c’mon DeMarco spit it out, SPEAK.
Tyson DeMarco: Listen man, I overreacted aight? But dude disrespected me back there coach you shoulda seen’em!
That was bullshit.
Tyson DeMarco: I was minding my business and this jackass came over spittin’ crap to me. Said he wanted to show me up or some shit. I ain’t no punk, not gonna front, I let’em. Said somethin’ smart, and then tried to swing on my ass. Dead serious, if it weren’t for the guys, I wouldn’t floored his ass.
I look at him with dangerous eyes, I look at the coach, almost raising out of my chair, looking at him with skepticism placed on my face.
Steve Lenton: You REALLY don’t believe this shit right...?!
Coach: ….You...leave my sight, when I get done with your big ass your won’t even be able to throw a punch let alone be able to lift your fighting body off of the ground.
Tyson DeMarco: Yessir.
He winked at me and left, checking his watch like he had somewhere to be. I was left there staring at the coach. I knew what was coming, I got comfortable, rubbing the tip of my chin with an agitated smirk.
Steve Lenton: This is it huh? This is how I’m goin’ out. Okay, um, thanks for the opportunity and--
Coach: Siiigh, sit down Stephen.
I lick the interior of my left cheek and hesitantly take my seat in front of him. He rubs the bridge of his nose.
Coach: Since you’ve been here, I’ve seen nothing but good things from you. You work your ass off every goddamn day, and you’re so humble I’m startin’ to think you bleed fucking rainbows and sunshine kid.
Steve Lenton: God that’s why you’re going to let me go, because HE said I started it....?
Coach: I don’t believe his bullshit kid. He might have gotten a scholarship, but he ain’t sharp like you are. I know you don’t start anything you can’t finished. I’ve watched your college tapes, and the coaches like your style....
Coach leans back in his chair and scratches his head.
Coach: Steve, I want you on the team. The guys like you, they don’t care about any of the crap that’s followed you from college. They just wanna win, put food on their kid’s table, and have a job they can be proud of. And...I know you want the same...and it’s gonna be hard...every obstacle is like that kid....but do not....jeopardize it. Which means...
His head gestured something. I glare for a moment, before getting what he’s saying.
Steve Lenton: You know that he’s going to give me crap for this...
Coach: Yeah well, you solve that by not paying him any mind. Now...I want you to go out there, apologize, and sweep it under the rug. Then, I wanna see you back tomorrow and showing these other rookies how you make it in the league alright...?
I knew there was a reason he took such a chance on me. Coach saw something in me, that people DID see, but were too blinded by my scandal. Kinda made me wanna cry, but right now I had to deal with some business. I got up and walked back to the locker room to get my stuff afterward. And there I saw him...standing there with a big cheesy smile, like he won. Just swallow your pride Steve...this is your dream, don’t let him take it.
Tyson DeMarco: So, looks like you ain’t gonna be playin’ huh? Knew coach didn’t have his head up his white ass. Yo bruh, I heard they hirin’ at Burger King...I’ll hook you up.
He laughed and I looked at him with a content face.
Steve Lenton: No thanks, I’m gonna still be playing here. Coach just grilled me, and also....
I dropped my bag and get in his face. He looked threatened and glared me down. No one was here to stop us, no coaches, teammates...I could hurt him. But...I rose my hand and I shook his with a compassionate glance.
Steve Lenton: ...Sorry for what happened earlier. Let’s just...put this behind us and move on alright?
Tyson DeMarco: ...Word.
I pick my bags up and walk off. It felt good you know....being the bigger man...? It had it’s perks...
For Now.
The Big L was standing HIGH up above San Diego, enjoying the sun and blue skies. I was dressed in a black shirt and a part of beige cargo pants, donning a pair of sunglasses. The Exodus Pro International Championship was draped over my shoulder as I take in deep calm breaths, looking ahead with a determined aura surrounding me. I lick my lip getting ready to start...
Steve Lenton: Two weeks ago, the odds against The Big L were stacked once again, as he went up against men who had the credentials to become title contenders in this company. The Big L fought, he went through, he kicked some ass, and he showed the people that if they wanted a shot at this on my shoulder, they would have to get past ME. And so they failed, I showed up strong and now, The Big L is feelin’ good! He bathed in the sun, got a nice little tan, lookin’ like a big golden Teddy Graham cookie! He’s been enjoying himself for the past week, and he’s been feelin’ unstoppable!
Slowly, I glare at the camera, taking my sunshades and placing them on my head.
Steve Lenton: And then....they put me in the ring with the San Diego champion, Jerry Matthews. Matthews, big man, tough, kind of loopy, but dangerous. Jerry believes himself to be righteous, a sword of God, the only man who’s got his ears to the cloud. See Jerry, looking at you, lookin’ at what you represent...bring me back to my mother. My mom devoted her life to God, and in doing so was blessed with me and my lil’ brother. She always told me during tragedy, when the bad always outweighted the good, “God will sort things out for you...” and I didn’t know how it was going to make me feel better.
When my grandmother died from a stroke, when my grandfather--God bless his soul in heaven--stayed strong for almost 80 YEARS of his life until he passed on to meet my grandmother up at the Pearly gates....I realized...what it meant. When I cried, and when I carried my granddaddy’s coffin down to gravesite, I felt the world had dropped around me. And I realized...that God would sort things out. So he did, I went to high school, got my shit together, I made something of myself AND I DOMINATED football! The Big L he knew....h-he knew...God had his back. When he was given the boot from the NFL, I KNEW..HE...would sort it all out. I always had God on my side Jerry, never strayed away from the church.
See Jerry, you got this idea that your ideas are that of JUSTICE. That you’re fighting for something greater than title belts and matches. No, what you believe you are is a crusader. Someone who’s lookin’ to clean those of sin and blasphemy, when in reality you’re prejudice and your insecurity make you a hypocrite, not because read the bible, but you use a piece of literature that preaches PEACE...and use it as a sword to impale honest to God good people.
I shake my head, pointing at myself with a defiant stare at the lens.
Steve Lenton: You don’t know me...my struggle, the things I had to put up with, the shit I had to hear spewed my way by reporters, coaches, players, the internet, people tried to bring me down. And when the chips were against me, when people thought I was an afterthought, I emerged with THIS...
I smack my hand against the International Championship with authority.
Steve Lenton: The Big L like everything else FOUGHT. Didn’t need God to justify an ass kicking, didn’t need nitpicking scripture to make me right. I KNOW what I do is in the right. The Big L KNOWS what he does is for the greater good for this company, for these people, because unlike you Reverend Jackass, The Big L loves himself...and he loves these people. They love him because he doesn’t preach, he doesn’t mock, he doesn’t turn his nose up at them like he’s a uptight zealot. I’m going to let you know something, it’s a secret passed down The Big L tree. Jerry Matthews...do you know....why Jesus wept?
I lean my ear towards the camera.
Steve Lenton: OH, you don’t know. Let The Big L preach to ya Big Country. Ahem, Jesus wept...mmm...he wept....because he heard you speak. Know what he’s going to do come Sunday, a day of church and faith. He’s gonna rejoice Jerry, rejoice because his son, The ONE and ONLY, THE BIG BROWN HOOOOOLY, Steve Lenton, is going to take his boots, dip them bitches in the tears of a virgin, because the only tit he saw was his mama’s. I’m gonna lace’em up tight, and I’m going to cock back, and kick you in the HOLY...SPIRIT!!! PREACH ON!!!
I lower my sunshades and shrug my shoulders a bit, looking at the title.
Steve Lenton: Sunday, here in San Diego...The Big L is going to show you what it means to have faith. He has faith that the crowd will cheer, “Big L”. He has faith that his friends will root for him. And he has faith...that he’s going to beat your ass all over that ring. Now find a verse for THAT Big Dan!!
I storm off to the side and walk back down towards the ground. The camera zoomed in on the lovely view of San Diego. It begins to fade away slowly, until there was nothing.
Fade. Static. End.
Clawing my way to the top and getting somewhere...it feels abnormal to me. I feel a little warm inside, maybe because something’s stuck finally and I’m running with it. That’s all I ever wanted really...somewhere I belong where I can make friends and relationships. It feels great, yeah, should I get comfortable where I am? Should I feel satisfied with just this? Hell no. The belt I hold, paints a target on my back for everyone to come at me and take it away. They want me out of the picture, not because they see me as a legitimate threat; Though some people are good at fronting. They don’t like me because of my personality.
The way I talk, the things I say on Twitter, the people I interact with...it irks them. It makes me irritated that I got to this spot so fast in my career, and it shows. I see the faces, the glances, the comments, and I gotta say, all of this fuels me to do better. Jerry Matthews is a very good case of negative energy disguising itself as a positive aura. This guy can sit there and he can try and downplay me, make me seem like I ain’t got a fighting chance, but who the fuck is he? Just a guy with bible who doesn’t believe in Speed Stick.
For him to think he’s bringing guys like me everlasting salvation, really shows where we are in this day and age. What he is however is a misinformed screwjob who’s going to get the harsh reality that his delusional grandeur is going to come to a BIG halt. So Jerry can try and drag me down, but each comment he makes, it empowers me to put a boot up his holy anus. Everytime they think they’ve found me out...
I Come Back Stronger.
I was sitting down in the coached office, my heart was beating hard and I knew this wasn’t going to end well. I was glaring at this bastard on my right, who was glaring daggers right back at me, like he wanted to do something. Believe me, I welcomed it, I wanted him to make a move, and I wanted to finish what he started. But there he was, with this cocky look on his face, thinking he was going to get some sort of special treatment. Mr. First-Round-Pick was beginning to tick me the Hell off and he knew it. There Coach came in, looking at both of us like a father would to two fighting brothers. He sat down at his desk which was piled with playbooks and tapes. He leaned forward with a serious glance, licking the front of his upper teeth and pointed at us both.
Coach: So tell me this, why the Hell shouldn’t I cut both of your asses loose? Why shouldn’t I ban your asses from this facility....hm? Tell me why the Hell I get called back in here trying to build a FOOTBALL team, just to see two boys fighting amongst each other just to see who’s cock is bigger.
I looked at Tyson DeMarco, who didn’t look like he was ready to talk. I rub the back of my neck and lean forward.
Steve Lenton: I just wanna say--
Coach: Save it Lenton. I wanna know what Mr. Number One has to say, c’mon DeMarco spit it out, SPEAK.
Tyson DeMarco: Listen man, I overreacted aight? But dude disrespected me back there coach you shoulda seen’em!
That was bullshit.
Tyson DeMarco: I was minding my business and this jackass came over spittin’ crap to me. Said he wanted to show me up or some shit. I ain’t no punk, not gonna front, I let’em. Said somethin’ smart, and then tried to swing on my ass. Dead serious, if it weren’t for the guys, I wouldn’t floored his ass.
I look at him with dangerous eyes, I look at the coach, almost raising out of my chair, looking at him with skepticism placed on my face.
Steve Lenton: You REALLY don’t believe this shit right...?!
Coach: ….You...leave my sight, when I get done with your big ass your won’t even be able to throw a punch let alone be able to lift your fighting body off of the ground.
Tyson DeMarco: Yessir.
He winked at me and left, checking his watch like he had somewhere to be. I was left there staring at the coach. I knew what was coming, I got comfortable, rubbing the tip of my chin with an agitated smirk.
Steve Lenton: This is it huh? This is how I’m goin’ out. Okay, um, thanks for the opportunity and--
Coach: Siiigh, sit down Stephen.
I lick the interior of my left cheek and hesitantly take my seat in front of him. He rubs the bridge of his nose.
Coach: Since you’ve been here, I’ve seen nothing but good things from you. You work your ass off every goddamn day, and you’re so humble I’m startin’ to think you bleed fucking rainbows and sunshine kid.
Steve Lenton: God that’s why you’re going to let me go, because HE said I started it....?
Coach: I don’t believe his bullshit kid. He might have gotten a scholarship, but he ain’t sharp like you are. I know you don’t start anything you can’t finished. I’ve watched your college tapes, and the coaches like your style....
Coach leans back in his chair and scratches his head.
Coach: Steve, I want you on the team. The guys like you, they don’t care about any of the crap that’s followed you from college. They just wanna win, put food on their kid’s table, and have a job they can be proud of. And...I know you want the same...and it’s gonna be hard...every obstacle is like that kid....but do not....jeopardize it. Which means...
His head gestured something. I glare for a moment, before getting what he’s saying.
Steve Lenton: You know that he’s going to give me crap for this...
Coach: Yeah well, you solve that by not paying him any mind. Now...I want you to go out there, apologize, and sweep it under the rug. Then, I wanna see you back tomorrow and showing these other rookies how you make it in the league alright...?
I knew there was a reason he took such a chance on me. Coach saw something in me, that people DID see, but were too blinded by my scandal. Kinda made me wanna cry, but right now I had to deal with some business. I got up and walked back to the locker room to get my stuff afterward. And there I saw him...standing there with a big cheesy smile, like he won. Just swallow your pride Steve...this is your dream, don’t let him take it.
Tyson DeMarco: So, looks like you ain’t gonna be playin’ huh? Knew coach didn’t have his head up his white ass. Yo bruh, I heard they hirin’ at Burger King...I’ll hook you up.
He laughed and I looked at him with a content face.
Steve Lenton: No thanks, I’m gonna still be playing here. Coach just grilled me, and also....
I dropped my bag and get in his face. He looked threatened and glared me down. No one was here to stop us, no coaches, teammates...I could hurt him. But...I rose my hand and I shook his with a compassionate glance.
Steve Lenton: ...Sorry for what happened earlier. Let’s just...put this behind us and move on alright?
Tyson DeMarco: ...Word.
I pick my bags up and walk off. It felt good you know....being the bigger man...? It had it’s perks...
For Now.
The Big L was standing HIGH up above San Diego, enjoying the sun and blue skies. I was dressed in a black shirt and a part of beige cargo pants, donning a pair of sunglasses. The Exodus Pro International Championship was draped over my shoulder as I take in deep calm breaths, looking ahead with a determined aura surrounding me. I lick my lip getting ready to start...
Steve Lenton: Two weeks ago, the odds against The Big L were stacked once again, as he went up against men who had the credentials to become title contenders in this company. The Big L fought, he went through, he kicked some ass, and he showed the people that if they wanted a shot at this on my shoulder, they would have to get past ME. And so they failed, I showed up strong and now, The Big L is feelin’ good! He bathed in the sun, got a nice little tan, lookin’ like a big golden Teddy Graham cookie! He’s been enjoying himself for the past week, and he’s been feelin’ unstoppable!
Slowly, I glare at the camera, taking my sunshades and placing them on my head.
Steve Lenton: And then....they put me in the ring with the San Diego champion, Jerry Matthews. Matthews, big man, tough, kind of loopy, but dangerous. Jerry believes himself to be righteous, a sword of God, the only man who’s got his ears to the cloud. See Jerry, looking at you, lookin’ at what you represent...bring me back to my mother. My mom devoted her life to God, and in doing so was blessed with me and my lil’ brother. She always told me during tragedy, when the bad always outweighted the good, “God will sort things out for you...” and I didn’t know how it was going to make me feel better.
When my grandmother died from a stroke, when my grandfather--God bless his soul in heaven--stayed strong for almost 80 YEARS of his life until he passed on to meet my grandmother up at the Pearly gates....I realized...what it meant. When I cried, and when I carried my granddaddy’s coffin down to gravesite, I felt the world had dropped around me. And I realized...that God would sort things out. So he did, I went to high school, got my shit together, I made something of myself AND I DOMINATED football! The Big L he knew....h-he knew...God had his back. When he was given the boot from the NFL, I KNEW..HE...would sort it all out. I always had God on my side Jerry, never strayed away from the church.
See Jerry, you got this idea that your ideas are that of JUSTICE. That you’re fighting for something greater than title belts and matches. No, what you believe you are is a crusader. Someone who’s lookin’ to clean those of sin and blasphemy, when in reality you’re prejudice and your insecurity make you a hypocrite, not because read the bible, but you use a piece of literature that preaches PEACE...and use it as a sword to impale honest to God good people.
I shake my head, pointing at myself with a defiant stare at the lens.
Steve Lenton: You don’t know me...my struggle, the things I had to put up with, the shit I had to hear spewed my way by reporters, coaches, players, the internet, people tried to bring me down. And when the chips were against me, when people thought I was an afterthought, I emerged with THIS...
I smack my hand against the International Championship with authority.
Steve Lenton: The Big L like everything else FOUGHT. Didn’t need God to justify an ass kicking, didn’t need nitpicking scripture to make me right. I KNOW what I do is in the right. The Big L KNOWS what he does is for the greater good for this company, for these people, because unlike you Reverend Jackass, The Big L loves himself...and he loves these people. They love him because he doesn’t preach, he doesn’t mock, he doesn’t turn his nose up at them like he’s a uptight zealot. I’m going to let you know something, it’s a secret passed down The Big L tree. Jerry Matthews...do you know....why Jesus wept?
I lean my ear towards the camera.
Steve Lenton: OH, you don’t know. Let The Big L preach to ya Big Country. Ahem, Jesus wept...mmm...he wept....because he heard you speak. Know what he’s going to do come Sunday, a day of church and faith. He’s gonna rejoice Jerry, rejoice because his son, The ONE and ONLY, THE BIG BROWN HOOOOOLY, Steve Lenton, is going to take his boots, dip them bitches in the tears of a virgin, because the only tit he saw was his mama’s. I’m gonna lace’em up tight, and I’m going to cock back, and kick you in the HOLY...SPIRIT!!! PREACH ON!!!
I lower my sunshades and shrug my shoulders a bit, looking at the title.
Steve Lenton: Sunday, here in San Diego...The Big L is going to show you what it means to have faith. He has faith that the crowd will cheer, “Big L”. He has faith that his friends will root for him. And he has faith...that he’s going to beat your ass all over that ring. Now find a verse for THAT Big Dan!!
I storm off to the side and walk back down towards the ground. The camera zoomed in on the lovely view of San Diego. It begins to fade away slowly, until there was nothing.
Fade. Static. End.