Post by PANTHRO on Jul 27, 2013 22:54:59 GMT -6
What I’m Made Of....
My dad...use to tell me when I was a kid that if I wanted to do something, I gotta work for it. My old man worked his ass off to the bone. He went to the same high school as me, Bethel High, a defensive end. He could have been a pro if he wanted to, but he loved something more, art. My dad was a great artist, and he went to Hampton University where he worked for their newspaper, while studying to be an engineer. However, during those Reagan years, his student loans piled up and he had to drop out and work as a bag boy down at the local grocery store.
So he worked his ass off, became to best damned bag boy there was in Montgomery Ward, and he did it with pride. Every morning, he’d get in that busted up car and would drive to work, and get to baggin’! And when a door opened up for him, when that lil’ crack opened for him, he got to work in the shipyard. And for over two decades my old man’s busted both his feet, arthritis in his hands, and a burn on his chest from when HOT metal that he was cutting! And these scars, those achy joints, those hurt feet......didn’t stop him from getting his ass up from his bed at 4 in the fucking morning....and getting his money.
And until this day, my father is still working like he’s a 30 year old man in the best shape of his life, even though he’s had health complications because of his occupation. And everytime I talk to him, when I see him smile, and hear him speak, I hear the strength in his voice. He showed me what a man is made of. You had sacrifices, you fight for everything you’ve got. Tooth and nail, that is what you gotta do in order to make it in this world. He ain’t never sugarcoat shit for me, and he told me the truth.
This ain’t about competition, it’s not about the thrill of it all, it ain’t about egos, culture clashes, superfights. It’s about what the fuck you’re made of. What do you have inside of you that you’re willing to let out when your body is beaten down into a HEAP. You either get UP and you stay DOWN!!! And reassure, I don’t plan on laying down on the ground remembering what could have been again. I’ve been in that story and it sucks. Cannon gets to see what I’m made of, he gets to feel it first hand, and BELIEVE ME......he’s going to see that everything I put my heart and soul into....every little word that comes from my loud ass mouth....comes from my SOUL.
Endgame. I ain’t even afraid of that word, because everyday of The Big L’s life could be that one day, but I ain’t scared. I’m looking at this in another light, this is not the end of days, the end of everything as we know it; To me it’s a test to see who’s going to put their heart and soul into this match Johnny, and believe me, I do that anyway so it isn’t any different for me, you should know that. When it comes down to it John-Boy, The Big L has you beat when it comes to the commitment aspect of things.
I went through Hell for this match. The first time my eyes locked on towards yours, I knew....I was in for something special. We're going to be bringing this fucking house down, and people are damn well going to be talking about this for a long time. Fuck the curse, the critics, the naysayers on both sides. One of us ain't leavin' with a strap.
And It Ain't Gonna Be Me.
And there I was, glaring at my future slipping away, or what I could see at the moment. I tried to move, but everything hurt. It felt like my lungs were on fire. The airbag might have hit me hard in the chest...that was probably why it felt like a wrecking ball smacked me in the body. I tried to call out to Tyson, it hurt, but I had to do something. I could let this happen....not when things were going so well for me. I made a promise to coach, a promise I can’t take back. He was my responsibility, and if he died....
No...don’t think about that.
Steve Lenton (gasping): ….Ty....on....Tyson........ey.......
I tried to reach towards him and nudge him weakly. The sound of sirens came, and suddenly I closed my eyes. Was I dying? No...I could feel some faint sense of warmth. I opened my eyes and heard people talking. There were bright lights, people asking me questions. My eyes open a bit, my shirt was opened up, flashlights beaming in my eyes.
Doctor: Sir, sir can you hear me....?
Steve Lenton: Ty.....Tyson where’s he?
Doctor: Your friend is fine, he just has a concussion and a few abrasions. Sir you were in a car accident, you’ve got a cracked chest and fractured ribs. You have to let us work.
Steve Lenton: I don’t--I--
Doctor: He’s losing consciousness! Sir? Sir.
The voices sounded like faint echoes in my brain. Once I opened them again I was placed in a bed, tubes stuck in me, pasties all over my chest, and I was bandaged up around my waist chest area. I sat up some--OUCH--bad idea. I glance around and saw someone sitting down in front of me. It was coach....and the assistant coach. I look at them both and went silent....
Coach: …...
He just looked at me for a moment, then rubbed the bridge of his nose slowly.
Coach: I went to go check your hotels to make sure you all were in bed. When I got there the receptionist told me that you all went out on the town. I prayed to God you all weren’t dumb enough to go to some fucking club.
Steve Lenton: Coach I--
Coach: Let. Me. Fucking. Finish.
The room was dead silent.
Coach: I asked you to look after Tyson, told you not to start anything with him....you gave me your promise Steve and you broke it.
Steve Lenton: I--I was--coach I was talking him back, he was distracting me and--
Coach: And what...?!? You took your eyes off of the road?! You could have gotten yourself killed!!!
Steve Lenton: Coach....I am...so....so, so, very sorry. Just please--
Coach: I’ve called your folks, I let them know what happened. They fixed you up and you’re going to go down to the precinct and you are very lucky you were driving that car....they said your blood was fine. Guess that was one of your better decisions right...?
Steve Lenton: …..I--
Coach stands up and looked me dead in the eye. Something told me....this...was it.
Coach: GM called me and told me to let you go Steve....I’m sorry....
Steve Lenton: No! J-just let me make it up please, don’t do this to me!
Coach: You did it to yourself.....
Steve Lenton: Coach. COACH.
He walked out, I wanted to get up and follow’em...but I was connected this fucking machine. Next thing I knew my body started to quiver and I felt tears roll down my cheeks. I sobbed quietly to myself. My face burned with rage suddenly, my right arm rammed into a machine and I let out an angry shout. That was it, my life was over with. And it was all....my fault....all my fault.
This Is SportsCenter!! With your host Stuart Scott!
Stuart Scott: Good evening and welcome to Sportscenter, I’m Stuart Scott. We have breaking news on a car accident down in New York City. Number one draft pick Tyson DeMarco and undrafted free agent Stephen Lenton were both in the car they were driving. Both were hospitalized and won’t face charges. However we are informed Lenton has been released from the team by general manager Tom Donahoe. He was reported saying:
Stuart Scott: Stephen Lenton made the team not too long ago having an impressive preseason. Many people believed he had let his previous scandal go behind him. We caught up with the head coach of the Buffalo Bills for his reaction....
Coach: Steve is a good kid, I’ve talked with him and he shares his regrets for this uh....incident. It’s sad we had to let him go but......I can’t argue with the higher-uppers.
Reporter: Do you think Lenton was responsible for this...?
Coach: I can’t say, I mean Tyson DeMarco is a well mannered guy...GREAT attitude....they made the right choice....and that is all I can say....thank you.
Reporter: So is Stephen Lenton to blame or Tyson DeMarco, reports say Lenton was clean and Tyson may have been the one who caused the crash. His blood alcohol level was over the standard level.
Coach: Look, I don’t get to make these decisions, I mean if I did, I wouldn’t be talkin’ to all of you. Lenton and DeMarco were both in a serious accident, so we should let them rest. Thank you have a nice night.
Stuart Scott: As you can see coach was havin’ words with the press. We’ll keep you updated on--
It was over....everything....
Over.
The setting was different, this was the RIMAC Arena in San Diego. I was sitting here alone in this place, stripped down to nothing but concrete for this show. I sat here, title wrapped around my waist. I was dressed up in casual attire, a tank top, some jeans, sneakers, and a pair of shades. I slowly take my shades off and put them in the collar of my tanktop and glared ahead at the camera with a content expression, rubbing the bottom of my lip lightly.
Steve Lenton: When I wasn’t a wrestler, when I wasn’t this freak of nature, I weighed over 300 pounds. I sat on my fat ass for three years, three hard, hellacious, tough years. My parents tried to get me out of the house, my friends tried to get me to move, but I felt so fucking sorry for myself that I felt like I should just not exist. Because the consequences of my actions ONE night....took everything, and I didn’t see anything worth fighting for. So it began to dawn on me that, all the awards, the records, and the praise were bullshit. Somewhere in my cynical thought process, I thought it was all for shit. I would drown myself in food, trying to make myself feel better. I would play video games, no sleep, and I got a part time job at a fucking Burger King where I made $7.25 an hour which didn’t even come close enough at payin’ my bills on time.
I remember somewhere in my humanity, I tried to get back in shape. I did a push-up, let me repeat A PUSHUP and I gave up. I went back to my fridge and I gave myself cake for my accomplishment. Some nights I thought I could cry or die. But one night it changed for me, I saw something I was a fan of, professional wrestling. I saw guys that I use to look like, looking excited, happy.....alive, and I went to shows in small community centers and venues, and I said to myself, “I want to be happy too.” And for that short time, that moment, I was dedicated. I sweat, I cried, I puked up all those years of sitting there and feeling like a sack of fat SHIT, and I got back to my old self.
I glare at my hands for a moment and clench them, breathing slowly. I wipe my face feeling some emotions that I didn’t want Cannon to see. I sniff quickly and glare forward.
Steve Lenton: Johnny, my consequences brought me agony. And these consequences Johnny, they have brought me....enlightenment. The Big L....he knows what it’s like Johnny when you’re down on your fuckin’ luck with nothing to show for it. You got these damn people who once praised you and held you up to shine in the sun, only for them to drop you into obscurity!! And what it does Johnny is make us both stronger. However, it turned The Big L into a fucking beast. See he knows what this match means to you, so he won’t take that away from you, but let me remind you who I AM.
I slowly stand up, and I put my sunshades back on with a proud smirk, shaking my head. My smirk turns into an determined scowl as I begin to lay the law down.
Steve Lenton: This is the ONE and ONLY, The Black Hulk, The Brown Skin Assassin, Mr. ENTERTAINMENT HIMSELF....The Big L. And lemme tell ya Simpson, you better have a slingshot stuffed in your knickers or somethin’ because the only way you stop the Big L from takin’ his left foot, BIG BEN from meeting with your ass Sunday night is if you KILL’EM!!! The BIg L stands here, the belt firmly across his waist, warm, toasty like a sexy woman wrapped around ya after givin’ her some of dat JUNGLE LOVE, giving you the challenge Cannon: TAKE IT. Because The Big L is waiting for you to step into that ring, look me dead in the eye and snatch it!!!
Because some people are right, I do hold myself in a different light, I do see myself as someone who should be at the top, and I damn well know where my talent is Johnny!! Yeah those people are damn right John! The Big L sees himself being one of the most AMAZING International champions in the history of Exodus Pro Wrestling! The fans know I am, my friends and family know I am, but now I gotta prove it to YOU. It’s been a long tiring two weeks Johnny, we’re busted tail to get in shape, and we’ve shared a bond of hardships.
I stop and adjust, taking a firm stance, taking the belt off my waist with authority and sling it over my shoulder with confidence. My chin tilted up in a dignified manner as I hide my eyes through my shades.
Steve Lenton: But, there ain’t no way in Hell I’m giving this belt up. So Sunday night Johnny, I want you to get yourself somethin’ to drink, some of that good ass drink. I want you to feel relaxed, want ya to feel good John-Boy, nice and comfortable. Because at Endgame, my foot is about to get REAL intimate with your ass!!!! The Big L is READY...for the FIGHT...of his LIFE!!!!
I shrug my shoulders and march out of the empty venue. I made my statement clear...and Johnny was going to feel it first hand Sunday night.
Fade. Static. End.
My dad...use to tell me when I was a kid that if I wanted to do something, I gotta work for it. My old man worked his ass off to the bone. He went to the same high school as me, Bethel High, a defensive end. He could have been a pro if he wanted to, but he loved something more, art. My dad was a great artist, and he went to Hampton University where he worked for their newspaper, while studying to be an engineer. However, during those Reagan years, his student loans piled up and he had to drop out and work as a bag boy down at the local grocery store.
So he worked his ass off, became to best damned bag boy there was in Montgomery Ward, and he did it with pride. Every morning, he’d get in that busted up car and would drive to work, and get to baggin’! And when a door opened up for him, when that lil’ crack opened for him, he got to work in the shipyard. And for over two decades my old man’s busted both his feet, arthritis in his hands, and a burn on his chest from when HOT metal that he was cutting! And these scars, those achy joints, those hurt feet......didn’t stop him from getting his ass up from his bed at 4 in the fucking morning....and getting his money.
And until this day, my father is still working like he’s a 30 year old man in the best shape of his life, even though he’s had health complications because of his occupation. And everytime I talk to him, when I see him smile, and hear him speak, I hear the strength in his voice. He showed me what a man is made of. You had sacrifices, you fight for everything you’ve got. Tooth and nail, that is what you gotta do in order to make it in this world. He ain’t never sugarcoat shit for me, and he told me the truth.
This ain’t about competition, it’s not about the thrill of it all, it ain’t about egos, culture clashes, superfights. It’s about what the fuck you’re made of. What do you have inside of you that you’re willing to let out when your body is beaten down into a HEAP. You either get UP and you stay DOWN!!! And reassure, I don’t plan on laying down on the ground remembering what could have been again. I’ve been in that story and it sucks. Cannon gets to see what I’m made of, he gets to feel it first hand, and BELIEVE ME......he’s going to see that everything I put my heart and soul into....every little word that comes from my loud ass mouth....comes from my SOUL.
Endgame. I ain’t even afraid of that word, because everyday of The Big L’s life could be that one day, but I ain’t scared. I’m looking at this in another light, this is not the end of days, the end of everything as we know it; To me it’s a test to see who’s going to put their heart and soul into this match Johnny, and believe me, I do that anyway so it isn’t any different for me, you should know that. When it comes down to it John-Boy, The Big L has you beat when it comes to the commitment aspect of things.
I went through Hell for this match. The first time my eyes locked on towards yours, I knew....I was in for something special. We're going to be bringing this fucking house down, and people are damn well going to be talking about this for a long time. Fuck the curse, the critics, the naysayers on both sides. One of us ain't leavin' with a strap.
And It Ain't Gonna Be Me.
And there I was, glaring at my future slipping away, or what I could see at the moment. I tried to move, but everything hurt. It felt like my lungs were on fire. The airbag might have hit me hard in the chest...that was probably why it felt like a wrecking ball smacked me in the body. I tried to call out to Tyson, it hurt, but I had to do something. I could let this happen....not when things were going so well for me. I made a promise to coach, a promise I can’t take back. He was my responsibility, and if he died....
No...don’t think about that.
Steve Lenton (gasping): ….Ty....on....Tyson........ey.......
I tried to reach towards him and nudge him weakly. The sound of sirens came, and suddenly I closed my eyes. Was I dying? No...I could feel some faint sense of warmth. I opened my eyes and heard people talking. There were bright lights, people asking me questions. My eyes open a bit, my shirt was opened up, flashlights beaming in my eyes.
Doctor: Sir, sir can you hear me....?
Steve Lenton: Ty.....Tyson where’s he?
Doctor: Your friend is fine, he just has a concussion and a few abrasions. Sir you were in a car accident, you’ve got a cracked chest and fractured ribs. You have to let us work.
Steve Lenton: I don’t--I--
Doctor: He’s losing consciousness! Sir? Sir.
The voices sounded like faint echoes in my brain. Once I opened them again I was placed in a bed, tubes stuck in me, pasties all over my chest, and I was bandaged up around my waist chest area. I sat up some--OUCH--bad idea. I glance around and saw someone sitting down in front of me. It was coach....and the assistant coach. I look at them both and went silent....
Coach: …...
He just looked at me for a moment, then rubbed the bridge of his nose slowly.
Coach: I went to go check your hotels to make sure you all were in bed. When I got there the receptionist told me that you all went out on the town. I prayed to God you all weren’t dumb enough to go to some fucking club.
Steve Lenton: Coach I--
Coach: Let. Me. Fucking. Finish.
The room was dead silent.
Coach: I asked you to look after Tyson, told you not to start anything with him....you gave me your promise Steve and you broke it.
Steve Lenton: I--I was--coach I was talking him back, he was distracting me and--
Coach: And what...?!? You took your eyes off of the road?! You could have gotten yourself killed!!!
Steve Lenton: Coach....I am...so....so, so, very sorry. Just please--
Coach: I’ve called your folks, I let them know what happened. They fixed you up and you’re going to go down to the precinct and you are very lucky you were driving that car....they said your blood was fine. Guess that was one of your better decisions right...?
Steve Lenton: …..I--
Coach stands up and looked me dead in the eye. Something told me....this...was it.
Coach: GM called me and told me to let you go Steve....I’m sorry....
Steve Lenton: No! J-just let me make it up please, don’t do this to me!
Coach: You did it to yourself.....
Steve Lenton: Coach. COACH.
He walked out, I wanted to get up and follow’em...but I was connected this fucking machine. Next thing I knew my body started to quiver and I felt tears roll down my cheeks. I sobbed quietly to myself. My face burned with rage suddenly, my right arm rammed into a machine and I let out an angry shout. That was it, my life was over with. And it was all....my fault....all my fault.
This Is SportsCenter!! With your host Stuart Scott!
Stuart Scott: Good evening and welcome to Sportscenter, I’m Stuart Scott. We have breaking news on a car accident down in New York City. Number one draft pick Tyson DeMarco and undrafted free agent Stephen Lenton were both in the car they were driving. Both were hospitalized and won’t face charges. However we are informed Lenton has been released from the team by general manager Tom Donahoe. He was reported saying:
“Lenton disobeyed team rules, broke the trust of his team and coaches and thus injured our future star Mr. Tyson DeMarco who will be out for the remainder of this season. We have taken the actions and gone to the league front office and they have agreed with our disciplinary actions. We wish Mr. Lenton the best in all future endeavors....”
Stuart Scott: Stephen Lenton made the team not too long ago having an impressive preseason. Many people believed he had let his previous scandal go behind him. We caught up with the head coach of the Buffalo Bills for his reaction....
Coach: Steve is a good kid, I’ve talked with him and he shares his regrets for this uh....incident. It’s sad we had to let him go but......I can’t argue with the higher-uppers.
Reporter: Do you think Lenton was responsible for this...?
Coach: I can’t say, I mean Tyson DeMarco is a well mannered guy...GREAT attitude....they made the right choice....and that is all I can say....thank you.
Reporter: So is Stephen Lenton to blame or Tyson DeMarco, reports say Lenton was clean and Tyson may have been the one who caused the crash. His blood alcohol level was over the standard level.
Coach: Look, I don’t get to make these decisions, I mean if I did, I wouldn’t be talkin’ to all of you. Lenton and DeMarco were both in a serious accident, so we should let them rest. Thank you have a nice night.
Stuart Scott: As you can see coach was havin’ words with the press. We’ll keep you updated on--
It was over....everything....
Over.
The setting was different, this was the RIMAC Arena in San Diego. I was sitting here alone in this place, stripped down to nothing but concrete for this show. I sat here, title wrapped around my waist. I was dressed up in casual attire, a tank top, some jeans, sneakers, and a pair of shades. I slowly take my shades off and put them in the collar of my tanktop and glared ahead at the camera with a content expression, rubbing the bottom of my lip lightly.
Steve Lenton: When I wasn’t a wrestler, when I wasn’t this freak of nature, I weighed over 300 pounds. I sat on my fat ass for three years, three hard, hellacious, tough years. My parents tried to get me out of the house, my friends tried to get me to move, but I felt so fucking sorry for myself that I felt like I should just not exist. Because the consequences of my actions ONE night....took everything, and I didn’t see anything worth fighting for. So it began to dawn on me that, all the awards, the records, and the praise were bullshit. Somewhere in my cynical thought process, I thought it was all for shit. I would drown myself in food, trying to make myself feel better. I would play video games, no sleep, and I got a part time job at a fucking Burger King where I made $7.25 an hour which didn’t even come close enough at payin’ my bills on time.
I remember somewhere in my humanity, I tried to get back in shape. I did a push-up, let me repeat A PUSHUP and I gave up. I went back to my fridge and I gave myself cake for my accomplishment. Some nights I thought I could cry or die. But one night it changed for me, I saw something I was a fan of, professional wrestling. I saw guys that I use to look like, looking excited, happy.....alive, and I went to shows in small community centers and venues, and I said to myself, “I want to be happy too.” And for that short time, that moment, I was dedicated. I sweat, I cried, I puked up all those years of sitting there and feeling like a sack of fat SHIT, and I got back to my old self.
I glare at my hands for a moment and clench them, breathing slowly. I wipe my face feeling some emotions that I didn’t want Cannon to see. I sniff quickly and glare forward.
Steve Lenton: Johnny, my consequences brought me agony. And these consequences Johnny, they have brought me....enlightenment. The Big L....he knows what it’s like Johnny when you’re down on your fuckin’ luck with nothing to show for it. You got these damn people who once praised you and held you up to shine in the sun, only for them to drop you into obscurity!! And what it does Johnny is make us both stronger. However, it turned The Big L into a fucking beast. See he knows what this match means to you, so he won’t take that away from you, but let me remind you who I AM.
I slowly stand up, and I put my sunshades back on with a proud smirk, shaking my head. My smirk turns into an determined scowl as I begin to lay the law down.
Steve Lenton: This is the ONE and ONLY, The Black Hulk, The Brown Skin Assassin, Mr. ENTERTAINMENT HIMSELF....The Big L. And lemme tell ya Simpson, you better have a slingshot stuffed in your knickers or somethin’ because the only way you stop the Big L from takin’ his left foot, BIG BEN from meeting with your ass Sunday night is if you KILL’EM!!! The BIg L stands here, the belt firmly across his waist, warm, toasty like a sexy woman wrapped around ya after givin’ her some of dat JUNGLE LOVE, giving you the challenge Cannon: TAKE IT. Because The Big L is waiting for you to step into that ring, look me dead in the eye and snatch it!!!
Because some people are right, I do hold myself in a different light, I do see myself as someone who should be at the top, and I damn well know where my talent is Johnny!! Yeah those people are damn right John! The Big L sees himself being one of the most AMAZING International champions in the history of Exodus Pro Wrestling! The fans know I am, my friends and family know I am, but now I gotta prove it to YOU. It’s been a long tiring two weeks Johnny, we’re busted tail to get in shape, and we’ve shared a bond of hardships.
I stop and adjust, taking a firm stance, taking the belt off my waist with authority and sling it over my shoulder with confidence. My chin tilted up in a dignified manner as I hide my eyes through my shades.
Steve Lenton: But, there ain’t no way in Hell I’m giving this belt up. So Sunday night Johnny, I want you to get yourself somethin’ to drink, some of that good ass drink. I want you to feel relaxed, want ya to feel good John-Boy, nice and comfortable. Because at Endgame, my foot is about to get REAL intimate with your ass!!!! The Big L is READY...for the FIGHT...of his LIFE!!!!
I shrug my shoulders and march out of the empty venue. I made my statement clear...and Johnny was going to feel it first hand Sunday night.
Fade. Static. End.