Post by Nicholas Gray on Dec 23, 2015 22:40:23 GMT -6
(taking place a few days after the match with Beowulf)
The passage of time hadn’t made it any easier.
In the weeks since finding out the truth about his father, himself, and his power, Jason Protivnik has not been able to shake the weight he now felt on himself. All of that knowledge, all of the despair it brought to him, it felt like it was physically pushing him down to the ground. He felt like a ship lost at sea, in the dead of night, about to crash into the jagged rocks at shore.
He hadn’t slept well in that long. He’d manage to finally fall under, only to be confronted with visions of his father lifting a great machine over his body and crashing it down onto him again and again and again and again and again, until he awoke in a cold sweat.
Tired, pulled down, all he could do now was worry.
Worry about himself, if his “father” found out what he knew.
Worry about Jennifer, if his “father” turned his eye to her.
And worry about what was him and what wasn’t.
Since finding out the truth, that was what scared him the most. The question about how much of what he thought and did was himself, and how much of it was staked in there by his “father,” overriding what he himself would have done. Some things were easy to recognize. Jennifer, and everything he felt for her, that was himself. Love had no advantages to a mad scientist. But some things he wasn’t certain about, that he spent so much time worrying over.
Like how much he enjoyed smashing a chair into the head of Stacey-X.
The look of her dazed, pained face. The angry and worried yells of Jolyne. The angry, pained yellings of Beowulf as he demanded a chance at revenge.
All of that had made him smile.
But why? Why did he attack a woman who had nothing to do with his rebalancing act? Why did he enjoy seeing someone who loved her be so angry at what he’d done? Why did he plan to be put in an ugly, violent match with a man he knew would hospitalize him, all to destroy his standing in the eyes of others?
How could he put Jennifer through the pain of seeing him in a hospital bed again, on purpose?
He wasn’t sure if it was because of his “father” messing with his head, or if that was all him, and this was just naturally something he enjoyed.
He wasn’t sure which one scared him more.
All of these worries pressed on him, adding to the weight.
Now all he could do was think about all of that.
And worry about that constant dead spot in his mind’s eye.
One thing he could do was send out a field, getting a feeling of everything living in an area. But since that day he found out the truth, something was wrong. Every time he extended that field he picked up what he normally did. Animals, insects, people, small and big, able to focus in enough to only pick up the types of things he wanted to look out for, to be able to read them enough to get intent and thoughts from.
But now there was always a spot that simply was missing. Not like there wasn’t something there, but like there was but he just couldn’t focus on it. Couldn’t read it.
Usually at the edge of where the field was where it was. Like it wanted him to know it was there, to know that it was the one thing unreadable to him.
And finally he had had enough of it.
He went for a walk, leaving his apartment building and going down the street. He sent the field out and there the dead spot was, at the edge. He kept walking, going into more and more secluded of areas, getting farther and farther from people. Until it was just some insects buzzing, himself, and the dead spot.
And finally it moved.
Faster than he expected, the spot moved from where it was at the edge of his field, to just a short distance behind him. He drew in a breath, held it, and let it out. And he turned.
And there stood a man with no face.
Dressed in an immaculate white suit, black dress shirt and a gold tie, he would’ve caught eyes even without the thing on his head. Some hard-looking black material was on his face, shards from the edge digging into the back of his skull to secure it to his head.
And he waved at Jason.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...I should just take up drinking.
And then the Faceless Man spoke, and in that moment Jason felt something wrong in his head. The voice was familiar. So familiar, and yet it wasn’t coming to him. It was almost like when you have something on the tip of your tongue. Where the connection was just out of reach.
Except here it felt like that connection was being gripped just out of his reach by a hand that wasn’t his own.
The Faceless Man: Wouldn’t that just dull your skills?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah but at this stage...
He then blinked a few times, realizing that he was starting to have a conversation about nothing with a man with no face, and that it hadn’t seemed odd to him. He scowled at the man.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Fuck that. Why can’t I read you?
A chuckle leaves the man with no face.
The Faceless Man: You have your abilities, Mr. Protivnik, and so do I.
Jason’s eye twitched from sudden, crushing annoyance.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Another fucking Mark?
He shakes his head.
The Faceless Man: No, no. I do not bear a Mark. I am…
A pause.
The Faceless Man: Less, I suppose.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...right.
The Faceless Man shrugs.
The Faceless Man: But I’m not the topic, Mr. Protivnik. You and your father are.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...in case you haven’t heard, he’s not actually my father.
The Faceless Man: Yes, yes, I’m well aware...that’s why I’m here.
Jason raised an eyebrow.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: And what’s that mean?
Despite the thing on his face, Jason got the feeling he smiled at that.
The Faceless Man: I just want to talk to you and offer you advice.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Oh, great, a shrink.
He paused.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Actually, considering all of this, I might need one…
The Faceless Man shook his head.
The Faceless Man: Wastes of time. Just have a small talk with me, it can’t hurt anything.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...alright. Let’s.
The Faceless Man: Good. So, how are you dealing with all of this?
Jason laughed a short, bitter laugh.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Oh, I’m doing GREAT! My father’s a murderer, he’s stealing my powers, my powers are a curse, there’s a fucking cyborg who might put a bullet in me! It’s a fucking PARADE OF LAUGHS!
The man with no face nodded.
The Faceless Man: It is quite unfair, putting all of this on you at once, shouldering you with all of this painful knowledge. Especially as you have to make a choice.
Jason looked confused, which did not surprise the Faceless Man.
The Faceless Man: You missed that when you ran out of the Arino house. You see, in a short bit of time, if all the Marks are not gathered, things will come to an end. You have a choice between helping the Marks already gathered, or simply trying to run from this all for some possible safe haven.
This hit Jason hard. Another weight added to him suddenly, more of that feeling of being pushed down into the Earth.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...why does it all have to keep growing…
The Faceless Man: Sorry. There’s no gentler way to introduce this information to you.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Great...great...make a choice...that’ll be easy.
The Faceless Man: Well, I understand it’s sudden...
Jason shook his head.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: You’re not understanding. Everything in my head just feels wrong now. Left and right, black and white, all of it’s so fucked up. I don’t know what’s me, I don’t know what’s my father, I don’t know what’s this curse! I think things and can’t be sure if they’re coming from me or something else! I just…
He reaches up and rubs his hands on his head, hoping for some relief. None comes.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: You say what I do helps choose between the end of...something, or keeping it going. But I can’t tell which one I think is the right one.
The Faceless Man listens to this, and nods along. Nothing about what he’s said seems to surprise the man, his body language going unchanged the entire time. If anything, he seems pleased.
The Faceless Man: Then why not look elsewhere for it? An unbiased eye that you can trust?
For a moment his expression turns angry.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Who’s left around me that could do tha-
He stopped, a look of realization coming over his face. The Faceless Man nodded.
The Faceless Man: The Lighthouse waiting for you in the darkness. Even if you can’t trust yourself...you can trust her.
Anderson slowly nodded, as finally he felt some relief. After three weeks of indecision and despair, something finally made sense to him. The one person he could trust above anyone else. She deserved to know the truth, no reason to keep secrets. Secrets, he realized, had done nothing but harm him.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Thank you. I needed this. I have someone I need to talk to, so please excuse me.
The Faceless Man nodded.
The Faceless Man: Of course. I hope you find some relief in this trying time.
Anderson nodded back, and started to walk back the way he had came, walking past the man with no face. As he passed him, he stopped, looking back to him. Something was bothering him.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: What am I supposed to call you?
The Faceless Man: What to call me...?
He pauses. After a moment, Jason gets the feeling he’s smiling again.
The Faceless Man: Nigami. Call me Nigami.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Then thank you, Nigami.
Nigami: Anytime, Mr. Protivnik. It’s what I’m here for. I wish you the best.
Anderson nodded again, and once again began to walk away, Nigami watching him.
Even with the weight bearing down on him, forcing him down more and more, there was one thing that did not weigh on him. One person that he knew he could trust with all of this, who deserved to know it all, and whose opinion on what he needed to do was the most valuable thing he could have right now.
So off he went, to visit his Lighthouse.
--
By the time he reached Jennifer’s apartment he’d mostly lost his nerve.
All of the doubts, all of the uncertainties, had come rushing back. Like a tidal wave crashing into him, it was the same again. The weight, crushing down on him, threatening to leave him curled up on the floor again.
But he had to push past it. He had to see her.
He reached up and knocked on the door.
A few moments later the door opened and he saw her face. The two immediately break into grins seeing the other, and Jennifer hops up to embrace her boyfriend.
Jennifer Smith: Jason! I’m so happy to see you walking!
That made his smile disappear, as he remembered again. He broke away from the hug and walked into the apartment, crashing down into a chair. She watches this, smile falling off. She shuts the door and walks over to him.
Jennifer Smith: Are you alright?
Jason laughed, and a hand comes up to rub at his eyes, head shaking.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: No...no...haven’t been.
Jennifer nodded.
Jennifer Smith: I had a feeling. You’ve been...off, since you got out of the hospital. The last time, not this time.
Clearly the pain that remembering what he’d chosen to put her through showed on his face, and she takes a seat next to him, face lined with worry.
Jennifer Smith: Alright. So what’s been eating at you?
He sighed, knowing now he couldn’t run from it any longer. There was no escaping it now, it was time to be honest about everything. Might as well start with the positives.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: For one thing, I got into a fistfight with Chris Strike.
Jennifer Smith: You what?!
For a moment she looks shocked, even worried. But that’s replaced with a curiosity, as she leans forward in her seat.
Jennifer Smith: Did you get a good shot in on that asshole?
Jason grinned.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I kicked his ass. He could barely lay a hand on me.
Jennifer Smith: That’s amazing! It’s just like my fanfics, well some of them anyway, sometimes Strike has to top, but that’s amazing!
A small pause, then, as the obvious question occurs to her.
Jennifer Smith: ..why did you get into a fight with Strike?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...well, that’s why I’m here.
Jennifer smiled.
Jennifer Smith: Besides seeing me.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Well yes, that part is important. I just...need to tell you something.
Jennifer Smith: Okay. Tell me.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Right, okay. How to put this...I am..uh..
He paused, taking a deep breath. He slowly breathed it out, and said it.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I’m psychic.
That bright, reassuring smile on Jennifer’s face fell.
Jennifer Smith: ...what?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah. Psychic. Mind-reading, moving things, whole thing. Because I’m part of a cursed bloodline, which my dad who, actually, isn’t my dad has been exploiting for evil reasons because he’s a mad scientist it turns out.
There is a long, long bout of silence in the room as Jennifer’s eye widened.
Jennifer Smith: Oh nononononono...
She got up from her seat, grasping Jason’s head in her hands. She started looking into his eyes, which only made his confusion worse.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: What are you doing?
Jennifer Smith: I’m pretty sure you can look into someone’s eyes for signs of a concussion.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: A concussion!?
His shout makes her take a step back suddenly, and Jason looks at her with the saddest look she’s ever seen from him.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: You think I’m crazy.
Jennifer Smith: Well, I mean...you just said you’re psychic, and after what that bitch did to you, and what happened against Beowulf…
Jason shook his head.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: It’s not that. This is real. As much as I hope and wish it wasn’t, it is. Just...what would it take to convince you?
Jennifer tapped a finger against her chin in thought, sitting back down in her chair while looking across the room before deciding.
Jennifer Smith: Well...I’ve been wanting to move that bookshelf in the corner to the opposite side of the room.
Jason looked at it, and then back at her, then back at the bookshelf, and then back.
And decided fuck it, after everything else, being a moving crew was genuinely the most normal thing he could do.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Alright.
He stood up from his chair and faced the bookshelf. And, as he prepared himself, a thought occurred to him.
What if, when he tried to do this, it didn’t work. What if nothing happened, and he was crazy all along? Nothing about his father was true, nothing about these powers, this curse, all of it just the delusions caused by a concussion.
...it was nice to have comforting thoughts at a time like this.
And so he focused on the bookshelf, and he closed his eyes.
And when he opened them they glowed a bright yellow. And the gasp Jennifer made to seeing his eyes was quickly replaced with a yelp as she realized the bookshelf was moving. She watched it as it floated across the room to the opposite wall, slowly turning to rest itself against the wall. Jennifer, without thinking, spoke up.
Jennifer Smith: ..more to the right?
It floated over a tiny bit to the right, and was set down. Jason plopped back into his seat, and just looked at his girlfriend, who stared at the bookshelf wide-eyed and open mouthed. She finally turns her head to him.
Jennifer Smith: ...I have so many questions.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah, I know that feeling.
And so he explained everything. All that he could remember. His father, waking up in the hospital and being told about his place as Libra, his discovery of his true power, his fight with Strike, the cyborg who told him the truth, and the faceless man who pushed him here.
Jennifer...took it well.
Jennifer Smith: hoooooooooooly shit.
Jason could only nod.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah. Pretty much. I still can’t believe the things coming out of my mouth either.
Jennifer nods.
Jennifer Smith: Yeah, clearly. It’s taken a lot out of you, I can see. I wish you had told me sooner, so I could help.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I’m sorry I didn’t tell you any of this until now. I...didn’t know how.
She smiled at him.
Jennifer Smith: You just say the words, it’s really easy.
He chuckled.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Well we both know that’s not that easy for me. But...I do need your help.
Jennifer Smith: What do you need?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I...don’t trust myself right now. Everything is so jumbled up in my head, I can’t make sense of anything. I just...need someone I love’s thoughts on...a choice.
Jennifer tilted her head.
Jennifer Smith: A choice?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah, a choice. The guy with no face told me about it.
Jennifer Smith: Always a good source of information.
Jason let out a laugh despite the situation.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah...according to him, when all the curses get brought together something ends. He...didn’t really specify what, or go into detail. Just that it ends. And told me I had the choice to fight that, or run.
For a moment, Jennifer only stares at him. And her question after takes him off balance.
Jennifer Smith: ...what kind of choice is that?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah, I know, it’s...a lot to take in and al-
Jennifer Smith: No, it’s not.
Jason’s expression changed to one of confusion as Jennifer leaned in.
Jennifer Smith: All of this you’ve told me? That is a lot to take in, yeah. It’s a mountain. But this choice you’re tearing yourself up over? It’s nothing.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I...I don’t understand…
Jennifer Smith: Fight whatever this...horrible thing is, or try and run from it? That’s no choice. You are not the kind of person to run away from something like that. You’re not a coward. You’re going to stand up, and you’re going to fight it.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I...don’t know if that is me.
Jennifer reached out, taking one of Jason’s hands into her own. She smiles at him.
Jennifer Smith:I know it is. Because no matter who you “really” are, what your Father did to you, what’s wrong with your blood...you’re my Ace. And my Ace is a fighter, not a coward.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I…I know. It’s just so hard…
Jennifer stood up, still holding his hand, making him stand up as well. She embraced him, wrapping her arms around him, which he quickly reciprocated.
Jennifer Smith: It was so hard, but now you’re not going to have to deal with it alone. I’m here, I’ll bear it with you. And we’ll be fine.
And for the first time in a long while, Jason smiled.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: You’re right.
Everything would be fine.
Or, at least, it WOULD be fine.
When they were safe. When there was no danger. No threat to her.
And that would only come once Jason had killed his father.
To be concluded in Chapter 3: A Father/Son Talk
The passage of time hadn’t made it any easier.
In the weeks since finding out the truth about his father, himself, and his power, Jason Protivnik has not been able to shake the weight he now felt on himself. All of that knowledge, all of the despair it brought to him, it felt like it was physically pushing him down to the ground. He felt like a ship lost at sea, in the dead of night, about to crash into the jagged rocks at shore.
He hadn’t slept well in that long. He’d manage to finally fall under, only to be confronted with visions of his father lifting a great machine over his body and crashing it down onto him again and again and again and again and again, until he awoke in a cold sweat.
Tired, pulled down, all he could do now was worry.
Worry about himself, if his “father” found out what he knew.
Worry about Jennifer, if his “father” turned his eye to her.
And worry about what was him and what wasn’t.
Since finding out the truth, that was what scared him the most. The question about how much of what he thought and did was himself, and how much of it was staked in there by his “father,” overriding what he himself would have done. Some things were easy to recognize. Jennifer, and everything he felt for her, that was himself. Love had no advantages to a mad scientist. But some things he wasn’t certain about, that he spent so much time worrying over.
Like how much he enjoyed smashing a chair into the head of Stacey-X.
The look of her dazed, pained face. The angry and worried yells of Jolyne. The angry, pained yellings of Beowulf as he demanded a chance at revenge.
All of that had made him smile.
But why? Why did he attack a woman who had nothing to do with his rebalancing act? Why did he enjoy seeing someone who loved her be so angry at what he’d done? Why did he plan to be put in an ugly, violent match with a man he knew would hospitalize him, all to destroy his standing in the eyes of others?
How could he put Jennifer through the pain of seeing him in a hospital bed again, on purpose?
He wasn’t sure if it was because of his “father” messing with his head, or if that was all him, and this was just naturally something he enjoyed.
He wasn’t sure which one scared him more.
All of these worries pressed on him, adding to the weight.
Now all he could do was think about all of that.
And worry about that constant dead spot in his mind’s eye.
One thing he could do was send out a field, getting a feeling of everything living in an area. But since that day he found out the truth, something was wrong. Every time he extended that field he picked up what he normally did. Animals, insects, people, small and big, able to focus in enough to only pick up the types of things he wanted to look out for, to be able to read them enough to get intent and thoughts from.
But now there was always a spot that simply was missing. Not like there wasn’t something there, but like there was but he just couldn’t focus on it. Couldn’t read it.
Usually at the edge of where the field was where it was. Like it wanted him to know it was there, to know that it was the one thing unreadable to him.
And finally he had had enough of it.
He went for a walk, leaving his apartment building and going down the street. He sent the field out and there the dead spot was, at the edge. He kept walking, going into more and more secluded of areas, getting farther and farther from people. Until it was just some insects buzzing, himself, and the dead spot.
And finally it moved.
Faster than he expected, the spot moved from where it was at the edge of his field, to just a short distance behind him. He drew in a breath, held it, and let it out. And he turned.
And there stood a man with no face.
Dressed in an immaculate white suit, black dress shirt and a gold tie, he would’ve caught eyes even without the thing on his head. Some hard-looking black material was on his face, shards from the edge digging into the back of his skull to secure it to his head.
And he waved at Jason.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...I should just take up drinking.
And then the Faceless Man spoke, and in that moment Jason felt something wrong in his head. The voice was familiar. So familiar, and yet it wasn’t coming to him. It was almost like when you have something on the tip of your tongue. Where the connection was just out of reach.
Except here it felt like that connection was being gripped just out of his reach by a hand that wasn’t his own.
The Faceless Man: Wouldn’t that just dull your skills?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah but at this stage...
He then blinked a few times, realizing that he was starting to have a conversation about nothing with a man with no face, and that it hadn’t seemed odd to him. He scowled at the man.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Fuck that. Why can’t I read you?
A chuckle leaves the man with no face.
The Faceless Man: You have your abilities, Mr. Protivnik, and so do I.
Jason’s eye twitched from sudden, crushing annoyance.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Another fucking Mark?
He shakes his head.
The Faceless Man: No, no. I do not bear a Mark. I am…
A pause.
The Faceless Man: Less, I suppose.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...right.
The Faceless Man shrugs.
The Faceless Man: But I’m not the topic, Mr. Protivnik. You and your father are.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...in case you haven’t heard, he’s not actually my father.
The Faceless Man: Yes, yes, I’m well aware...that’s why I’m here.
Jason raised an eyebrow.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: And what’s that mean?
Despite the thing on his face, Jason got the feeling he smiled at that.
The Faceless Man: I just want to talk to you and offer you advice.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Oh, great, a shrink.
He paused.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Actually, considering all of this, I might need one…
The Faceless Man shook his head.
The Faceless Man: Wastes of time. Just have a small talk with me, it can’t hurt anything.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...alright. Let’s.
The Faceless Man: Good. So, how are you dealing with all of this?
Jason laughed a short, bitter laugh.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Oh, I’m doing GREAT! My father’s a murderer, he’s stealing my powers, my powers are a curse, there’s a fucking cyborg who might put a bullet in me! It’s a fucking PARADE OF LAUGHS!
The man with no face nodded.
The Faceless Man: It is quite unfair, putting all of this on you at once, shouldering you with all of this painful knowledge. Especially as you have to make a choice.
Jason looked confused, which did not surprise the Faceless Man.
The Faceless Man: You missed that when you ran out of the Arino house. You see, in a short bit of time, if all the Marks are not gathered, things will come to an end. You have a choice between helping the Marks already gathered, or simply trying to run from this all for some possible safe haven.
This hit Jason hard. Another weight added to him suddenly, more of that feeling of being pushed down into the Earth.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...why does it all have to keep growing…
The Faceless Man: Sorry. There’s no gentler way to introduce this information to you.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Great...great...make a choice...that’ll be easy.
The Faceless Man: Well, I understand it’s sudden...
Jason shook his head.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: You’re not understanding. Everything in my head just feels wrong now. Left and right, black and white, all of it’s so fucked up. I don’t know what’s me, I don’t know what’s my father, I don’t know what’s this curse! I think things and can’t be sure if they’re coming from me or something else! I just…
He reaches up and rubs his hands on his head, hoping for some relief. None comes.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: You say what I do helps choose between the end of...something, or keeping it going. But I can’t tell which one I think is the right one.
The Faceless Man listens to this, and nods along. Nothing about what he’s said seems to surprise the man, his body language going unchanged the entire time. If anything, he seems pleased.
The Faceless Man: Then why not look elsewhere for it? An unbiased eye that you can trust?
For a moment his expression turns angry.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Who’s left around me that could do tha-
He stopped, a look of realization coming over his face. The Faceless Man nodded.
The Faceless Man: The Lighthouse waiting for you in the darkness. Even if you can’t trust yourself...you can trust her.
Anderson slowly nodded, as finally he felt some relief. After three weeks of indecision and despair, something finally made sense to him. The one person he could trust above anyone else. She deserved to know the truth, no reason to keep secrets. Secrets, he realized, had done nothing but harm him.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Thank you. I needed this. I have someone I need to talk to, so please excuse me.
The Faceless Man nodded.
The Faceless Man: Of course. I hope you find some relief in this trying time.
Anderson nodded back, and started to walk back the way he had came, walking past the man with no face. As he passed him, he stopped, looking back to him. Something was bothering him.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: What am I supposed to call you?
The Faceless Man: What to call me...?
He pauses. After a moment, Jason gets the feeling he’s smiling again.
The Faceless Man: Nigami. Call me Nigami.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Then thank you, Nigami.
Nigami: Anytime, Mr. Protivnik. It’s what I’m here for. I wish you the best.
Anderson nodded again, and once again began to walk away, Nigami watching him.
Even with the weight bearing down on him, forcing him down more and more, there was one thing that did not weigh on him. One person that he knew he could trust with all of this, who deserved to know it all, and whose opinion on what he needed to do was the most valuable thing he could have right now.
So off he went, to visit his Lighthouse.
--
By the time he reached Jennifer’s apartment he’d mostly lost his nerve.
All of the doubts, all of the uncertainties, had come rushing back. Like a tidal wave crashing into him, it was the same again. The weight, crushing down on him, threatening to leave him curled up on the floor again.
But he had to push past it. He had to see her.
He reached up and knocked on the door.
A few moments later the door opened and he saw her face. The two immediately break into grins seeing the other, and Jennifer hops up to embrace her boyfriend.
Jennifer Smith: Jason! I’m so happy to see you walking!
That made his smile disappear, as he remembered again. He broke away from the hug and walked into the apartment, crashing down into a chair. She watches this, smile falling off. She shuts the door and walks over to him.
Jennifer Smith: Are you alright?
Jason laughed, and a hand comes up to rub at his eyes, head shaking.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: No...no...haven’t been.
Jennifer nodded.
Jennifer Smith: I had a feeling. You’ve been...off, since you got out of the hospital. The last time, not this time.
Clearly the pain that remembering what he’d chosen to put her through showed on his face, and she takes a seat next to him, face lined with worry.
Jennifer Smith: Alright. So what’s been eating at you?
He sighed, knowing now he couldn’t run from it any longer. There was no escaping it now, it was time to be honest about everything. Might as well start with the positives.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: For one thing, I got into a fistfight with Chris Strike.
Jennifer Smith: You what?!
For a moment she looks shocked, even worried. But that’s replaced with a curiosity, as she leans forward in her seat.
Jennifer Smith: Did you get a good shot in on that asshole?
Jason grinned.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I kicked his ass. He could barely lay a hand on me.
Jennifer Smith: That’s amazing! It’s just like my fanfics, well some of them anyway, sometimes Strike has to top, but that’s amazing!
A small pause, then, as the obvious question occurs to her.
Jennifer Smith: ..why did you get into a fight with Strike?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: ...well, that’s why I’m here.
Jennifer smiled.
Jennifer Smith: Besides seeing me.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Well yes, that part is important. I just...need to tell you something.
Jennifer Smith: Okay. Tell me.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Right, okay. How to put this...I am..uh..
He paused, taking a deep breath. He slowly breathed it out, and said it.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I’m psychic.
That bright, reassuring smile on Jennifer’s face fell.
Jennifer Smith: ...what?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah. Psychic. Mind-reading, moving things, whole thing. Because I’m part of a cursed bloodline, which my dad who, actually, isn’t my dad has been exploiting for evil reasons because he’s a mad scientist it turns out.
There is a long, long bout of silence in the room as Jennifer’s eye widened.
Jennifer Smith: Oh nononononono...
She got up from her seat, grasping Jason’s head in her hands. She started looking into his eyes, which only made his confusion worse.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: What are you doing?
Jennifer Smith: I’m pretty sure you can look into someone’s eyes for signs of a concussion.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: A concussion!?
His shout makes her take a step back suddenly, and Jason looks at her with the saddest look she’s ever seen from him.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: You think I’m crazy.
Jennifer Smith: Well, I mean...you just said you’re psychic, and after what that bitch did to you, and what happened against Beowulf…
Jason shook his head.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: It’s not that. This is real. As much as I hope and wish it wasn’t, it is. Just...what would it take to convince you?
Jennifer tapped a finger against her chin in thought, sitting back down in her chair while looking across the room before deciding.
Jennifer Smith: Well...I’ve been wanting to move that bookshelf in the corner to the opposite side of the room.
Jason looked at it, and then back at her, then back at the bookshelf, and then back.
And decided fuck it, after everything else, being a moving crew was genuinely the most normal thing he could do.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Alright.
He stood up from his chair and faced the bookshelf. And, as he prepared himself, a thought occurred to him.
What if, when he tried to do this, it didn’t work. What if nothing happened, and he was crazy all along? Nothing about his father was true, nothing about these powers, this curse, all of it just the delusions caused by a concussion.
...it was nice to have comforting thoughts at a time like this.
And so he focused on the bookshelf, and he closed his eyes.
And when he opened them they glowed a bright yellow. And the gasp Jennifer made to seeing his eyes was quickly replaced with a yelp as she realized the bookshelf was moving. She watched it as it floated across the room to the opposite wall, slowly turning to rest itself against the wall. Jennifer, without thinking, spoke up.
Jennifer Smith: ..more to the right?
It floated over a tiny bit to the right, and was set down. Jason plopped back into his seat, and just looked at his girlfriend, who stared at the bookshelf wide-eyed and open mouthed. She finally turns her head to him.
Jennifer Smith: ...I have so many questions.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah, I know that feeling.
And so he explained everything. All that he could remember. His father, waking up in the hospital and being told about his place as Libra, his discovery of his true power, his fight with Strike, the cyborg who told him the truth, and the faceless man who pushed him here.
Jennifer...took it well.
Jennifer Smith: hoooooooooooly shit.
Jason could only nod.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah. Pretty much. I still can’t believe the things coming out of my mouth either.
Jennifer nods.
Jennifer Smith: Yeah, clearly. It’s taken a lot out of you, I can see. I wish you had told me sooner, so I could help.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I’m sorry I didn’t tell you any of this until now. I...didn’t know how.
She smiled at him.
Jennifer Smith: You just say the words, it’s really easy.
He chuckled.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Well we both know that’s not that easy for me. But...I do need your help.
Jennifer Smith: What do you need?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I...don’t trust myself right now. Everything is so jumbled up in my head, I can’t make sense of anything. I just...need someone I love’s thoughts on...a choice.
Jennifer tilted her head.
Jennifer Smith: A choice?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah, a choice. The guy with no face told me about it.
Jennifer Smith: Always a good source of information.
Jason let out a laugh despite the situation.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah...according to him, when all the curses get brought together something ends. He...didn’t really specify what, or go into detail. Just that it ends. And told me I had the choice to fight that, or run.
For a moment, Jennifer only stares at him. And her question after takes him off balance.
Jennifer Smith: ...what kind of choice is that?
Jason Anderson Protivnik: Yeah, I know, it’s...a lot to take in and al-
Jennifer Smith: No, it’s not.
Jason’s expression changed to one of confusion as Jennifer leaned in.
Jennifer Smith: All of this you’ve told me? That is a lot to take in, yeah. It’s a mountain. But this choice you’re tearing yourself up over? It’s nothing.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I...I don’t understand…
Jennifer Smith: Fight whatever this...horrible thing is, or try and run from it? That’s no choice. You are not the kind of person to run away from something like that. You’re not a coward. You’re going to stand up, and you’re going to fight it.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I...don’t know if that is me.
Jennifer reached out, taking one of Jason’s hands into her own. She smiles at him.
Jennifer Smith:I know it is. Because no matter who you “really” are, what your Father did to you, what’s wrong with your blood...you’re my Ace. And my Ace is a fighter, not a coward.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: I…I know. It’s just so hard…
Jennifer stood up, still holding his hand, making him stand up as well. She embraced him, wrapping her arms around him, which he quickly reciprocated.
Jennifer Smith: It was so hard, but now you’re not going to have to deal with it alone. I’m here, I’ll bear it with you. And we’ll be fine.
And for the first time in a long while, Jason smiled.
Jason Anderson Protivnik: You’re right.
Everything would be fine.
Or, at least, it WOULD be fine.
When they were safe. When there was no danger. No threat to her.
And that would only come once Jason had killed his father.
To be concluded in Chapter 3: A Father/Son Talk
